Wannayetti is a daughter of one of those who disappeared during the infamous Tanjung Priok Massacre under the Suharto regime. A woman of extraordinary courage, she continues to search for her father and vows never to stop until justice has been achieved.
My father, Bachtiar Bt. Johan, was one of those who disappeared during the Tanjung Priok massacre in September 1984. He was 46 years old at that time. The tragedy started during a night sermon and Koran recitation. Its content was actually tame, telling those who attended to embrace all people regardless of religion or ethnicity, and constantly seeking justice from the government. I knew all of this because the stage where it was held was near our house.
The government, however, saw the sermon as PKI1 propaganda. That same night, elements from the Tentara Nasional Indonesia (TNI / National Soldiers of Indonesia) surrounded the stage and fired several shots so as to intimidate the crowd. I was scared when the firing began. A stray bullet even hit our house.
Immediately after the incident, my father joined a group from our village who went to the military station to ask for the release of those who gave the sermons. He did not return. It was then that we began entertaining thoughts that he too may have been abducted by the authorities, though my family personally found it hard to accept. We never thought that such a fate could happen to one of our family members.
I felt very helpless at that time. My relatives brought me to a house of a fellow victim to ensure my security, and there, I spent almost the whole day praying for my father’s return.
It was actually my mother who looked for Ayah (father). She went to the nearest military office located in Guntur Street, and there, she found piles of documents, but none of them indicated any information about my father’s whereabouts.
Frustrated, she asked the officers to bring back Ayah whether dead or alive. The TNI personnel replied by telling her to leave a tin container with food in it. If the tin can was returned empty, then my father was in the camp. She did precisely that and the tin can was eventually returned; but the food was left untouched.
I was merely 18 years old at that time and was just fresh out of high school. I was about to enter the academy to take up foreign languages, having completed my registration when my father disappeared. I started worrying about my education and our family’s future. “What would happen to me? What would happen to my younger siblings?” All of these questions raged in my mind. I was very upset and depressed.
Our anxiety became even more burdensome, for we had no inkling of the real situation nor did we know what was going on. Then we heard the news that the violence was committed by PKI extremists. We were surprised by all of the media reports, wondering what it could all mean. But we were not able to pay much attention to all these reports, since we were preoccupied with the search for our father.
I only became aware of the gruesome facts much later. Those who were arrested were first brought to the 0502 District Military Command in North Jakarta where they were tortured and physically abused. They were then transferred to Mapomdam Guntur where they were once again tortured and were forced to confess that they were deliberately trying to fight against the security forces.
From Guntur, they were brought to Laksusda Jaya and they were examined for one to three days before finally being handed over to the personnel of the Cimanngis Military Prison. There, the victims were once again tortured in dark a room without sunlight for three (3) months and were only fed once a day. On the other hand, the remains of those who were killed were either given to their families or were burned by the military.
Until now, I also cannot comprehend why they slaughtered all those people when in fact, they were merely holding a religious recitation. I feel that the Army is cruel and brutal. I hate them! But still, my fear far outweighs my anger.
The fact that bodies were found gives me comfort and hope. Seeing those bodies made me ask myself: “If some of the victims were found, why does my father remain missing? Maybe he is still alive. Maybe he will return to us someday.”
Eventually, however, we were able to accept our situation. Besides, we have nowhere to go or lodge a complaint. Every one of us was frightened and just kept silent for our own safety. Three (3) months after the incident, our family moved back to Pandang — our native village — to forget the tragedy and live peacefully. But some things cannot fully be erased.
Though my mother underwent therapy, we still thought family communication was better. Besides, at that time, it was dangerous to talk about these things with people you don’t personally know, even if they were trained psychologists.
After my father’s disappearance, I tried to live a normal life as much as possible. I even tried to enter a public academy to pursue a degree in foreign languages, but failed. Ironic as it may seem, the rector of that institution was a relative of ours. Instead of helping me, he rejected my application, since he did not want to be responsible for the daughter of a PKI member.
Our predicament was aggravated the more by the fact that we received no support whatsoever from the government. We have simply learned to view government actions on this issue with pessimism. It seems that nothing significant ever happens. We have also come to place the blame on Suharto, since we do not know who the triggermen were.
The trial of the Tanjung Priok massacre was also very disappointing. I think the whole event was just a charade. Imagine, all those soldiers being exonerated by the court! I think the judge was not impartial from the very beginning and may even have been bribed.
From the very start, the military disrespected the whole process. The defendants were always accompanied by a large number of TNI personnel from the Arhanud, Kodim (District Military Command) and Kopassus (Indonesian Special Armed Force). Who would practically fill the courtroom. They would come in full military regalia, complete with knives and pistols. They would also try to intimidate the victims and verbally abuse them when outside of the court.
Because of our experience, we have come to the conclusion that those who are vocal in their opinions are perceived by the state as people who disturb law and order. I think that those who disappeared believed that, as human beings, it was their duty to help the poor. But ironically, those who assist the poor become victims of involuntary disappearances themselves.
While we may not have been rich prior to my father’s disappearance, we were not totally desperate either. But since then, our situation turned for the worse, forcing us to trade some of our things just to raise money. My mother and I were both forced to look for a job. I now work in a private firm.
But we are still fortunate enough to have an organization which supports us through thick or thin. I still remember that when my father was still around, we would usually socialize. He said that if we want to learn something, it’s better to make friends with people who are smarter or more clever than us. It is for this reason that I readily joined an organization whose members share the same fate as ours. In so doing, we are able to create a forum to come up with ideas that might prevent enforced disappearances.
I also think that the organization, and the human rights movement as a whole, was instrumental in deposing Suharto. Now, we are in the era of reformasi where people can express and vote freely. I sincerely believe that the time will come when the government will finally own up to its crimes and justice will then be served. And to do so, international NGOs should still support the Indonesian struggle and never forget our sacrifices.
But there is, however, still much room for improvement. Like a fisherman, for example, I want the organization to provide us with the angler and not only the fish so that the fight for justice can continue, even if my generation is already long gone.
Footnotes
1 Partai Komunis Indonesia / Indonesian Communist Party has been blamed by government for the 1965 riots and has been banned since then.
